2nd Series 06/2 - Being Human
by Laura the infamous B
Summary: A little tag to Full Circle.


Being Human   
by Laura Boeff

  
  


Ace frowned as he found Cosmo sitting in the computer control room. It wasn't that it   
was unusual to find Cosmo here, but to find him just sitting.. starring... The young man didn't   
even register his presence as he walked into the horseshoe shaped computer console.   
"Hey."   
Cosmo jumped, feet skittering off the console as he spun on the older man.   
"Oh.. hey, Ace," he stammered.   
Ace smiled slightly, but cocked his head. "You okay? No problems with your magic?" It   
was Ace's first worry, that something had happened with Cosmo's returning sense of his magic.   
His friends condition had taken a 180 degree turn with the return of that vital sense of himself.   
Cosmo opened his mouth, then shut it and turned away.   
"No.. that's fine," he murmured softly.   
Ace frowned. Cosmo was.. disturbed, about something.   
"Then why the long face, partner?" he asked with forced cheerfulness, parking himself on   
the computer console. Cosmo avoided his gaze, turning a touch more to ignore him.   
"Nothing big. Just thinking, bro. No worries," Cosmo assured with a weak attempt at a   
smile.   
Like that was going to fool the older man. Over the last days Cosmo had been Ace's   
primary focus as he tried to help his friend survive the withdrawal he had suffered from. Maybe   
at one time he would have missed the more subtle gestures of Cosmo's face, but not now.   
"You can talk to me, Cosmo," Ace said simply.   
Cosmo let out an annoyed snort. "I'm okay, Ace. Really." He brushed it off, pushing   
himself out of the chair and making for the door.   
"What are you afraid of, Cosmo?"   
*Wham* That brought the teen to a screaming stop. He turned on the magician, anger in   
his eyes.   
"What do you mean by that?" It was almost snapped out.   
Ace crossed his arms over his chest and looked frankly at Cosmo.   
"Cosmo, why are you still afraid to talk to me when there's a problem? We've known   
each other for six years now. I know we've had trouble in the past, but I thought that was in the   
past." Ace slid off and came forward. "Cosmo, it's not like I haven't seen you at your worst. And   
you've seen me through bad times. I'm your friend, talk to me."   
Cosmo took a deep breath and sighed.   
"Ace... I.."   
He turned but Ace caught his arm, lightly, not really holding the young man, but Cosmo   
didn't fight free.   
"I... Man, it's just... Am I a leach?"   
Ace sighed at the sudden question. Cosmo's reaction to the blocking of the link. The   
young man had argued once about how he shouldn't be acting like that. Hated his own   
dependence. It was rather... unsettling, to have someone need you that much. Not that Ace   
didn't accept the responsibility, or even feel it was a burden, but it showed him how much his life   
affected another human being. That when he risked himself, he was really risking Cosmo as well.   
"No, Cosmo.. you're not a leach."   
"Then why do I feel like it?" Cosmo growled. "Man, it just seems like I'm emotionally   
dependent on you and I hate that. It's... it's.." He shook his head at that and gave up.   
Ace smiled slightly. "Cosmo, you are not emotionally dependent on me," he declared.   
Cosmo snorted. "Yeah, right. The moment I couldn't feel your emotions and presence I   
became a gibbering wreck. Man, that is so wrong."   
"Oh, like I would be any better if I lost my magic?" Ace laughed. "I cannot conceive how I   
would react, Cosmo, if I were to lose my magic. I most certainly am not going to judge you for   
your actions."   
Cosmo shook his head and glared around him.   
"You at least wouldn't be a basket case. Dude, lets drop this.." With a frustrated gesture,   
the young man headed for the exit.   
"Cosmo.. wait."   
Cosmo paused at the open door, though he kept his back to his partner.   
"Cosmo... why do you hate being emotionally tied to me?" Ace asked softly.   
"It's wrong, Ace! Man, it's just too weird."   
"Does the link feel weird to you? Does sensing my emotions feel weird?"   
Cosmo sighed and shook his head. "No.. it's not that.."   
"Then what?"   
Cosmo turned slowly, but still wouldn't look at him. "It's just that.. when I lost those   
feelings... Ace, I freaked, and I shouldn't have."   
Ace sighed and came forward, standing right in front of Cosmo.   
"And why not? Cosmo, emotional dependence is not a sin. We all become emotionally   
dependent with people we care about to some degree. That is why humans make friends and   
family. To have that dependence; to be part of each others lives and feelings."   
Tentatively, Ace reached out and touched Cosmo's arm.   
"That is why I think the link formed."   
"Because I'm a basket case," Cosmo snorted depreciatively.   
Ace shook his head slightly. "No, because it was what you needed, and what I needed.   
Magic has a tendency of doing what is needed sometimes. Whether you ask for it's help or not."   
Cosmo looked up at him confused. "Why would you need it, Ace? The link is one way.   
How can that help you?"   
Ace chuckled and rubbed a hand through his hair.   
"Well.. besides the obvious fact that you always know when I'm in trouble, I can't hide   
anymore, Cosmo. If you haven't noticed, I'm rather notorious for hiding my pain, my personal   
demons and dealing with my guilt myself. It's a rather self-destructive habit."   
Cosmo still looked confused.   
"I can't do that anymore. There is always one person on this planet that I trust, that   
knows what's really going on up here." Ace tapped his temple. "It means I can't hide from   
everyone, and more importantly, myself." He squeezed the captured arm gently. "In a way, I am   
emotionally dependent on you now. Your understanding of what is really going on in my head.   
What I'm really feeling. I'll admit, it can be frustrating that I can't hide or lie to you what I'm   
feeling. But then, most of my troubles come from that hiding."   
Ace smiled. "It is a reassurance, that I know you do understand what I'm truly feeling.   
That I don't have to explain, that you understand. It has made.. my acceptance of my own   
failures easier."   
Cosmo was silent for a moment, chewing his lower lip.   
"But why me? Why didn't you develop it?"   
"Because, like Kate said, as you started to trust me, you wanted to be with me, even   
when you couldn't. That desire formed the shard. Your desire to help, to be there for me. And it   
wasn't just the lost of the link that caused the severity of your reaction, Cosmo. You lost your   
magic! Your connection to it. Just like I said, I shudder at the thought. The magic is part of us.   
Part of you, even if you didn't learn of it till later in your life. Losing that connection was like   
being suddenly paralyzed. Losing the use of a part of yourself. The blocking of the link just gave   
you a focus. The overall problem was the loss of your magic! That kind of loss will effect you.   
Will hurt you."   
Ace laid his hands on the young man shoulders.   
"Cosmo, your reactions were natural. You were in withdrawal. Physically and mentally.   
Your reactions were no more than I would expect. How do you feel now?"   
Cosmo shrugged. "Okay. Feel normal."   
"Do you feel the need to stay near me? To be with me at all times?"   
A head shake. "No. Was planning to go out later with Ulene," Cosmo admitted.   
"That is not the reactions of a basket case, Cosmo," Ace chuckled. "That sounds   
completely normal."   
"But, Ace..."   
"But Ace nothing," Ace snorted. "Cosmo, you have recovered. The world is the way it   
should be again. Nothing more, nothing less. You were denied the most intimate access your   
body knows: your magic. You reacted negatively to that denial. You reacted like anyone would,   
who had suddenly lost that which was most precious to them."   
His hands tightened. "You're a fine young man, Cosmo. You've come a long way in your   
life and I am proud of you. You are *not* a basket case. Remember that and don't worry so   
much. We're friends, partners. We're there for each other and part of each others lives. Nothing   
wrong with it. And I, personally, would want it no other way," Ace told him honestly.   
Cosmo was silent, looked at the floor, then smiled.   
"Still worries me a little. How much it messed me up," he admitted.   
Ace nodded. "I know. It was a scary thing for you to go through. Heck, I was scared just   
knowing someone could do that to us. Could deny us our magic like that. You weren't the only   
emotional wreck, Cosmo, believe me. I've had some less then pleasant dreams about the whole   
prospect."   
"You and me both," Cosmo sighed. "Man, that is something I never want to go through   
again."   
Ace could only agree. Wholeheartedly.   
"Neither do I. So. You okay?"   
Cosmo exhaled heavily and nodded. "Yeah.. yeah. I guess it still freaks me out a bit.   
Being close to someone... needing them."   
"It's all part of being human. We'd be a pretty miserable species if we didn't need each   
other." Ace smiled.   
Cosmo returned it. "Thanks, Ace. For everything. For taking care of me and putting up   
with me."   
Ace chuckled, wrapping an arm around the younger man and walking him out the door.   
"It's all part and parcel to the deal, Cosmo. You've been there for me and I'll always be   
there for you," he said lightly, though the words were backed with all the strength of his heart.   
Cosmo grinned and went with him. "No other way, partner. Wouldn't want it any other   
way." 


End file.
